Creating my Own Meaning for My Suffering
In my intense suffering I have learned to create my own meaning.
The religion I used to believe in and rely on has failed to answer my questions and bring me any degree of lasting comfort.
Inspirational feel-good phrases have seemed sadistic in the face of my reality.
I have learned to make my own meaning and not rely on the interpretations of others; whether writers, scientists or religious persons.
In the permanent gash, body long, that my suffering has burrowed into me, I have found my own understanding of pain.
I have held closer something mine in the midst of hellish suffering, and that is my voice. It is not a small voice, and it is not a stupid one. It is a female voice, passionate and knowing of suffering and knowing of what it means to be pushed past ones limits and to still stay in such a unforgiving world.
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